Sometimes your head or mind plays games with you

It can trick you and say that something bad is good

It can trick you and say that you are not good enough

It can trick you while saying you are useless

Please follow your heart

The void

The sky is blue 

but my heart is too 

your ocean eyes

makes me wanna cry

again and again

I see your face

In every mirror I face

I hear your voice

in the void of your choice

Cause you did not choose me

you chose the void

I can not concentrate 

your voice is so sweet

I can listen to you

forever and ever

I know that I am fantasizing about you

maybe I wouldn't even like you

If I knew you better 

But I don't think I will ever

Know you better...

Life is and accident on purpose

Accidents help us learn about life

'cause life itself is kind of an accident

A big bang and flashing photons

You and I, we are some atoms

Maybe our atoms met before

Entangled, smashed, particles

Our quarks held by strong nuclear power

That must be why you looked so familiar

I felt some power filling the

Holes that I didn't know exist

You fulfilled me and left me

Now I don't know how to exist

Everything is stable now though

The earth is rotating around the sun

The moon is rotating around the earth

There's life and death and love and birth

Milkway's gonna be a black hole

In a million billion years or so

I will still feel the holes through

Even if it's a quadrillion year past through

You and I, we were accidents

We learned life together

Our photons are entangled

And our wavelength is the same

We have the same frequency

And this happens once in a billion years

Is this an accident,

Or is it just life now?

Is there really someone

out there waiting or looking

who can refill my holes?

It's like asking if there is a creator

You can believe in it, but can you really prove it?

No, you can't, scientifically impossible they say

Yes, you can, in your own way.

And just so you know, you don't have to explain it to others

They usually don't understand 

neither religion nor love.

But both exist

By accident.

Sometimes i wish i had parents who didnt use a very high voice while talking

And sometimes i wish i had parents who were calm when they were happy

I wish i had parents who were not night owls

But no

I got parents who are night owls and talk too loudly!

I never can sleep before 11 pm, NEVER EVER! 

I wanna move to my own house so bad rn...

 Ask me about stress.

Ask me about how there are only 3 minutes to my exam.

Ask me about my anxiety... 

And ask me about how I will always fail myself, even if I get a good Grade

Communication in me, to myself

Do you know why I love being alone?

I don't have to explain anything to anyone

Whatever I do, I do it fast and happily

I don't ever waste my time explaining why I do this or that

Especially when I do maths or physics

I remember having friends who didn't understand the problems

Sometimes I showed them how my problem-solving method 

But they didn't understand the solving method either

I am not going to lie when I look at those times back then

They were a pain in the ass

But they were also the reason why I understood everything better

Because I explained everything quite easily, in a way that they could understand

Which helped me understand everything deeper

Anyways, even though I miss my friends who didn't get things as easily as I did

I love solving problems all alone so that I can explain everything to myself!